Women Can't Be Priests So Stop ASKING

Vatican expressed in a press release that the most important church law is the exclusion of  women from being ordained. Other important Catholic rules are:

-You must be over 18 to sit in church exit row.

-Have to wait 30 minutes after swimming to have communion.

-No wearing sandals with socks.

-Dares can only go up to triple dog. 

-Hot dogs can only be consumed in multiples of 2.

-Quarters bearing the date 1967 shall not be used for tithing. 

-All references in the bible to the animal "ass" have been replaced with bedonkey donk. 

-Don't talk about church fight club.

more on vatican's announcements 

Catholics View On Women Priests

Catholic Church still refuses to ordain women as priests 'cause they don't want to share a bathroom. 


Read more on Vatican's Stance on Women

Catholics Still Say No GIRLS ALLOWED

The Vatican still believes that ordaining women as priests is a serious crime against church law due to their rampant infection of cooties. 


More News on Catholic Rules

The Vatican has released new rules regarding sexual abuse by priests. It's a minor change.




- Water Cooler Jokes


More on the Catholic Church

Catholic Church, New Policy on Sexual Abuse

The Vatican released new rules regarding sexual abuse by priests.  It's just a sheet of paper with "No" written in 517 different languages.


More News on Church Stance

Lady Gaga courts controversy by dressing like a nun in her new video.  Hoping to attract more 12-year old boys to the faith, the Catholic Church is going to wait and see how this one plays out.


-water cooler jokes